Wow… I mean, if you’ve got every possible impresive credential and have been trying for a solid decade, maybe it’s time to go the self-publishing route anyway, even if you’re not crazy about it? At least you’d have some closure (sort of) on those previous projects and maybe free up mental space for new ones. And/or put new effort into finding a third agent (third time’s a charm, they say!). I’ve self-published three works now, and am superclose to finishing up a novel — trying not to think about publishing at the moment, but I’m already feeling pre-frustrated about it. The thought of finding an agent and/or going through that entire process is highly unpleasant — whereas the thought of self-publishing is attractive in many ways (except of course any realistic possibility of it being successful). So… what’s a writer to do?! I guess just get lucky, as you said.